Old age is often seen as a time to spend doddering around happily with your grandchildren. In some cultures, you would be expected to spend time in prayer and reflection. In short, the last thing that you would expect from an elderly man or woman is an active interest in sex. But it’s true. Growing old does not have to sound the death knell for your sex life, does it?
In fact several couples continue to have extremely happy and satisfying sex lives even when the aging process has affected their bodies.
But it is irrefutable that growing old does place certain limitations on your sex life. For one, you are no longer in the peak of physical condition. Your muscles and bones are not as strong as they used to be, while your hormone production has also dipped over the years.
Your partner may be an extremely beautiful woman, but you’d have to strain to see her because of your failing eyesight. With your body playing truant, naturally, it would be unrealistic to expect that you can continue to have the same kind of sex life that you had 25 years ago. However, with a few adjustments and some degree of understanding from both partners, your sex life could still be great.
So what are the main problems that could crop up into your life as you age and how can these be solved?
1. Lack of Lubrication
As you age, you will realize that you may need some extra help with the sex act. In women, lubrication declines as they age. This is because the glands that secrete these lubricants become less active as women grow older. Sex when you are not well lubricated can cause irritation and discomfort and bring down the levels of pleasure. Therefore, it might be important for older women to take the help of additional lubricants to make up for the deficit in their body’s production. There are several over the counter lubricants available and they are pretty effective too.
2. Ailments Galore
As you grow old, chronic ailments set in. These may require a change in sexual habits and routines. For example, in case of heart attacks or some heart diseases, doctors may prohibit any kind of vigorous activity. This may be for a period of time or a permanent feature. Ask your doctor about what kind of sexual activities are permissible. He may advise you to adopt less strenuous postures or to ensure that there is no physical strain while having sex. Follow his order strictly to prevent any further health damage.
Most of us have to pop pills of various kinds as we grow older. Be sure to ask your doctor if it will have any impact on your sex life. If required you could ask him to change the medication or look for other ways to bring pleasure to your partner.
As you grow older concerns about age, retirement and changes in life style might cause sexual tension among partners. This can easily be resolved by keeping the channels of communication open. Talk to your partner, your doctor and even a therapist if required.
3. New Methods
Just as your body may need some extra help to make the sex act more pleasurable, you might need to take care of the atmosphere too. It might take much longer for you and your partner to get aroused. Setting the right atmosphere becomes very important to ensure successful sex as you grow older. Dim lights, low music, and a well decorated room – in short setting up a seductive atmosphere can help to get those hormones to kick in more urgently.
You might also need to spend more time in foreplay as you grow older. Talking, touching, caressing, and sensual massages generally do the trick. You must remember that as you grow older, sex does not have to include intercourse. In fact, 15 to 25% of men who are 65 and above find it difficult to get an erection at least one out of every four times that they have sex. So be prepared to accept the fact that you might not be able to complete the sexual act each time that you have sex. Sometimes just the act of being together can be very satisfying.
Even as you grow older, the importance of protected sex must not be forgotten. Being old does not protect you in any way from sexually transmitted diseases. Thus it makes sense to continue to use a condom while having sex.
There is no denying the fact that aging does affect your sex life. But it sure does not mean the end of it. As you age make a few adjustments, try and understand the limitations of your body and keep an open line of communication with your partner. That should make your sex life happy and fulfilling.
